SAN FRANCISCO — LinkedIn unveiled its latest feature today: a proprietary “Cringe Score” that rates professional posts on a scale from “Reasonable Update” to “Please Make It Stop.”
The algorithm assigns points based on key indicators including humble-brag density, number of paragraph breaks between single sentences, and whether the post begins with “I’m speechless” before proceeding to speak for 47 paragraphs.
“We noticed users were spending significant time hate-reading posts about people’s ‘journey’ and decided to monetize that engagement,” explained Chief Product Officer Tomer Cohen, whose own announcement post scored a 94 out of 100.
Early data shows posts reaching maximum cringe typically include phrases like “I’m not crying, you’re crying,” unsolicited career advice from 23-year-olds, and any sentence ending with “Let that sink in.”
The feature automatically flags content containing more than three emoji per sentence, inspirational quotes misattributed to Einstein, and stories that definitely didn’t happen followed by “and then everyone clapped.”
Premium subscribers can access advanced metrics including “Engagement Desperation Index” and “Second-Hand Embarrassment Velocity.” The company is also testing a “Cringe Forecast” that predicts when a connection is about to announce they’re “excited to share” something nobody asked about.
Beta testers report the highest-scoring posts universally begin with “AGREE?” in all caps.
When asked whether the feature might discourage authentic sharing, LinkedIn noted that ship sailed approximately 8 years ago.
At press time, seventeen thought leaders had already posted about the feature, each beginning with “Here’s what LinkedIn’s new Cringe Score teaches us about leadership.”
